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ship, commercially inviable

"A word, Captain?"

Stede turns from his beached boat. "Yes, Mr. Buttons?"

"Ye've yet to make me a proper first mate." He tugs his bandana.

"Ah yes! Simple matter of tweaking the manifest; I'll put Lucius on it at once."

"Must be ye who completes the rite."

Stede blinks; Buttons doesn't. "The rite?"

"'S'bout dominance." To Stede's horror, Buttons is disrobing. "'Tis proper a captain buggers his intended first."

All the ships in Stede's head capsize. "There's no other way?" he asks, batting Buttons away from his trousers.

Buttons considers. "Ye could always answer the Question."

"Oh thank God. I've always tested well!" Stede mops his brow. "Let's have it."

"Name one-thousand sea creatures."

"That's not a question!" snaps Stede.

"Then ye forfeit."

"No, I--" Stede thinks quickly. "As Captain, my duty is to delegate, yes?"

Buttons shifts. "Aye."

"Then I delegate this."

"To?"

"You. Tell me when you've finished," and Stede makes a hasty retreat.